


And what you least wanted, holds you down like a stone

by Tommykaine



Category: Original Work
Genre: Ambiguous Age, Ambiguous Gender, Ambiguous Slash, Bittersweet Ending, Fluff and Angst, Homelessness, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Other, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-16
Updated: 2018-02-16
Packaged: 2019-03-19 11:03:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 541
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13703136
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tommykaine/pseuds/Tommykaine
Summary: We've never had much, but I was happy. I didn't need anything else. I just needed you.I never would have left you if I could choose, but I couldn't.Someone else also made sure of that.





	And what you least wanted, holds you down like a stone

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the 5th Week of the 8th edition of the COW-T by LandeDiFandom, using the prompt: "‘Clipped wings, I was a broken thing’ (Sia – Bird Set Free)"

You found me almost by chance, when I was at my lowest.

I thought I was done for. I thought that was it for me.

I was expecting to find relief when threw myself down that bridge, but I didn't.

I thought I'd just die right away but my calculations were wrong. The water was so cold it burned on my skin as I plummeted right in it, it felt like I had thrown myself in hellfire.

I didn't want to die. I realised it right in that moment, as I was sinking down and struggled to get back to the surface, my whole body dragged down thanks to the weight of my backpack.

A bit too late for second thoughts. I had made sure there'd be no space for that.

Or so I believed.

  


You literally dragged me out of my misery.

You pulled me out of the water and helped me breathe, then you helped me take off my clothes and gave me your blanket, even as you were still drenched.

I thought you would scream at me, reprimand me for my gesture, tell me I was selfish to waste my life like that, but you didn't.

You just asked if I had a place to stay.

“Me neither”, you said with a grim smile. “But you're welcome to hang around if you wish. That is... if you don't mind staying around someone like me”.

  


You never insisted to know my story and I was infinitely grateful for that, although I still was wary.

Life had taught me that no one does something for nothing.

Well, guess I just never had you in my life before.

  


I was a broken thing when you had found me, the shadow of my former self.

If there ever had actually been such a thing.

There used to be a time where I legitimately thought I could do almost anything, if I set my mind to it. But that was years ago.

My wings had not just been clipped since then, they'd been ripped out of my back, leaving gaping wounds that I thought would never heal.

But you did. And you never asked for anything in return.

Despite what anyone else could think, I willingly gave you everything. My heart, my hopes, my dreams. Eventually, also my body.

I would have given you my virginity too, but I couldn't. Someone else had already made sure of that, way before we ever met.

  


We've never had much, but I was happy. I didn't need anything else. I just needed you.

I never would have left you if I could choose, but I couldn't.

Someone else also made sure of that.

  


Wherever you are, now I can't be with you, and it kills me inside.

But better me than you. His threats were clear enough.

“No else one would cry for a dead tramp. No one would even notice”.

I can survive it. I'm stronger than this. You've taught me that much in the time we were together.

So wherever you are, wherever you will be, please know this:

I will not give up and, one day, I will be set free again.

And this time, I will be the one to find you.

 


End file.
